Internal Pity Party

Originally Posted October 9, 2015

Do you ever have a week where a certain theme of the Bible seems to hit you from all sides? Like you’re in one Bible study and it comes up, and then you’re on Facebook and a quote pops up, and then you’re watching TV and something else reminds you? I believe God uses many different outlets to clue us into what we need to hear at certain moments in our lives.

This past week I’ve been struggling. My husband was out of town on business which left me to do, well, everything. For some women this wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary, but I am incredibly blessed to have a husband who is helpful around the house, with the kids, and supportive of me as my best friend, confidante, and the love of my life. So when he’s out of town, it’s really easy for stress to take over. I don’t know about you, but when I’m stressed and tired, the door to my mind is wide open for the enemy to enter. Needless to say, I’d been having an internal pity party all week.

I didn’t recognize it easily at first. I thought I was just tired, stressed, and maybe a teensy bit jealous that I was stuck at home while my husband got to travel. It wasn’t until I dove into my Bible study that I realized I was listening to the enemy’s lies. I wasn’t controlling my thoughts.

In 2 Corinthians 10:5 it says:

We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.

Did you realize you can take your thoughts captive? You can choose which ones to entertain and which ones to boot out?

There have been TONS of books written about the power of thoughts. Two of my favorites are by Joyce Meyer: Living Beyond Your Feelings and Battlefield of the Mind. I’ve read both cover to cover AND I’ve listened to them on audiobook and yet I still struggle with controlling my thoughts. And when I can’t control my thoughts, I have an incredibly hard time controlling any other part of my life. I will say things I don’t mean, eat more than I should, watch more TV than is necessary, put off things that need to be done, and even feel physically sick.

Thankfully, God placed all of these little sound bytes into my life to open my eyes. It was at this point I realized I was buying into what the enemy was whispering in my ear. John 8:44 calls the devil the father of lies and John 10:10 explains to us that the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy, so naturally the things he was whispering were not of love and peace but lies that were meant to steal my joy, kill my passion, and destroy my mood. I hate to admit it, but it took me three solid days to recognize what was going on. When I finally figured it out, though, it was like the black cloud hovering around me was whisked away by the warm breeze of God’s love.

I guess the moral of this story is twofold: one – listen when God is nudging you, and two – work to control your thoughts. I know I still have a long way to go but I’m thankful for how far I’ve come!

With Love & Light,



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